My Story

A field beside the college

When I was sixteen years old, God asked me a question in a dream. I was in a field next to the college I was attending. He asked me what I wanted.

I woke straight up and told Him three things.

One — I want to help as many people as possible.
Two — do whatever You must to me.
Three — put whatever You need in me.

Then I got up and walked away. Like the prodigal son.

I want to be honest about that last part, because it matters more than the dream itself. I asked for the assignment and then I left. Years went by. There was money, and there were seasons where I made a great deal of it. There were also seasons where it all went the other direction. I have been on both ends of that, and I can tell you the view from the top and the view from the bottom teach you different things — and you need both.

A college president’s son

I did not learn about colleges from a brochure. My father was a college president, and I grew up on the inside of one — hearing the conversations that happen after the campus tour ends and the families drive home. How decisions actually get made. What a school is really weighing. Where the money genuinely comes from.

That is an unusual thing to be handed as a child, and for years I did not think of it as anything at all. It was simply the house I lived in. It took me a long time to understand that most families walk into the biggest financial decision of their lives with none of it — and that I had been given something I was supposed to pass on. Two of my three books came directly out of that.

I went to Michigan State and took a BFA. Then I went to work.

Bachelor of Fine Arts, Michigan State University

The working years

Mercury Realty Group — President, CEO & Managing Broker since 2005

Business, mostly. Real estate, negotiation, building companies. In 2005 I became President, CEO and Managing Broker of Mercury Realty Group, and I have spent about twenty years in commercial real estate since — a great many rooms, a great many negotiations, and a very close view of what people actually do under pressure. Today I am President and CEO of TBKK Corp.

There were seasons where I made a great deal of money. There were also seasons where it went hard the other way. I have been on both ends of that, and I will tell you plainly: the view from the top and the view from the bottom teach you completely different things, and you need both. Anyone who has only had one of those views is missing half the picture, and usually does not know it.

All through it — more than thirty years now — I was studying people. Not as an academic exercise. Just watching, closely, what actually moves a person forward and what quietly keeps them exactly where they are. Everything I coach came out of those three decades of watching.

What the low places taught me

Anyone can be gracious when the account is full. The test is who you are when it is not — when you are counting what is left, when the plans you made did not hold, when you have to start again in a smaller room than the one you left.

Here is what I found there. The three things I told God at sixteen did not change. He kept every part of that bargain — including the part I would not have chosen if I had understood it. Do whatever You must to me. He did. And I would not trade what came out of it.

It also taught me what to charge. I coach on a sliding scale, and if you are not happy with the results, you do not pay me. That is not a clever marketing device. It is what a man who has been on the thin end of a year thinks is decent.

Why I keep saying the same three things

People expect a complicated answer. They expect a system, ten steps, a program you buy. I do not have one. I have three ideas, and I have watched them work in my own life and in the lives of people I have sat across from.

Love your neighbor

Treat him the way you want to be treated. Notice what that does not say. It does not say agree with him. It does not say support his views or pretend you share them. It says get along. Be civil. Respect him. And if he has harmed you, forgive him — which is mostly a thing you do for your own sake, so you can put the weight down and keep walking.

We have gotten very good at sorting each other into camps. It is costing us more than we know.

Pray, and do not worry

God loves you. Peace to all mankind — plain, basic peace between ordinary people.

And I want to say this next part plainly, because I believe it and few people say it out loud: we already have all the resources and all the capital we need to solve the issues facing America and the world. The money exists. The knowledge exists. The people exist. What is missing is not supply. It is peace, and it is the will to act together.

Learn something new each day

The Ten Commandments were given for us, not against us. They are not a fence to keep us out of something good. Try to live by them — they help all of us, and they hold a society together better than anything we have invented since.

When we sin, it hurts God, the creator. So repent. Surrender. And then get up tomorrow and learn one more thing than you knew today. Compound that over a life and it becomes something.

What I am doing now

Coaching, one person at a time. Writing most days. Getting the three books out — The End to Insomnia, Master the Game of College, and How to Play the Game of College and Win!

And giving half of it away. Fifty percent of everything the course and the e-books earn is donated to help America and the world, one free coaching session goes to somebody every month, and anyone under real financial pressure can simply write and ask. That is We Will Change the World — my attempt to actually work the assignment I asked for at sixteen, rather than just talk about it.

If any of this is useful to you, take it. That was the whole request I made at sixteen.